Reinforcement: A Parent-friendly Guide to Best Behaviour

The Basics of Reinforcement in ABA: A Parent-Friendly Guide

If you’ve ever cheered when your child took their first steps, clapped when they used the potty for the first time, or rewarded them with a sticker for finishing their homework, congratulations—you’ve already used reinforcement!

Reinforced.

In Applied Behaviour Analysis (ABA), reinforcement is a superpower that helps encourage positive behaviours in children. But how does it work, and how can you use it effectively at home? Let’s dive in!

What is Reinforcement?

Reinforcement simply means increasing the likelihood that a behaviour will happen again in the future. It’s like a gentle nudge that tells your child, “Hey, that thing you just did? Do it again!”

There are two types of reinforcement:

Positive Reinforcement: Adding something pleasant to encourage a behaviour. Think of praise, treats, extra playtime, or a high-five when your child does something great.
Negative Reinforcement: Removing something unpleasant to encourage a behaviour. This doesn’t mean something bad—it just means taking away an annoyance. For example, if your child puts away their toys and, in return, they don’t have to do an extra chore, that’s negative reinforcement at work!

Why Does Reinforcement Work?

Kids (and adults!) naturally repeat behaviours that bring desired results. If your child learns that using polite words earns them extra playtime, they’re more likely to keep using those polite words. Reinforcement makes learning fun and rewarding instead of stressful and frustrating.

The Magic of Immediate Reinforcement

Timing is everything! If a reward or praise comes right after a behaviour, your child connects the dots quickly. Think about snapping a picture—you have to press the button at just the right moment to capture the perfect shot. The same idea applies to kids! If your child shares a toy and you immediately say, “Wow! That was so kind of you to share!” they’re more likely to do it again.

Behaviour is always on the move—constantly shifting, evolving, and happening in real time. That’s why reinforcing right away is so important! If we wait too long, we might accidentally reward a completely different behaviour that happens moments later. Think of it like catching a moving train—you want to hop on at just the right moment so you end up where you want to go. The quicker we reinforce, the clearer the message: “Yes! That’s exactly what we want to see more of!”

Finding the Right Reinforcer

Not all kids are motivated by the same things, and that’s okay! The key is to find what excites your child. Here are some ideas:

Tangible Rewards: Stickers, small toys, or special treats.
Activities: Extra playtime, a trip to the park, or an extra bedtime story.
Social Praise: High-fives, big smiles, enthusiastic “Great job!”
Privileges: Extra screen time, choosing the family movie, staying up 10 minutes later.

Tip: Reinforcers lose their power if they’re overused. If your child always gets a sticker, they might stop caring. Mix it up and keep it exciting!

Reinforcement vs. Bribery—What’s the Difference?

Some parents worry that reinforcement is just bribery in disguise. Not true! The difference is in when the reward is offered.

Reinforcement happens after a behaviour (e.g., “You cleaned your room! Let’s play a game together!”)
Bribery happens before (e.g., “If you stop crying, I’ll buy you candy.”)

Reinforcement teaches kids that good behaviour leads to positive outcomes, while bribery can unintentionally teach them to misbehave just to get a reward.

Using Reinforcement at Home

Now that you understand the power of reinforcement, here are some fun ways to use it at home:

Create a Reward Chart: Let your child earn stars or stickers for behaviours like using kind words, brushing their teeth, or helping with chores. A certain number of stickers could lead to a bigger reward!
Verbal Praise Parade: Shower your child with excited praise when they do something awesome. The more specific, the better! Instead of just “Good job,” say, “I love how you put your shoes away all by yourself!”
Mystery Rewards: Keep things exciting by occasionally surprising your child with a reward for good behaviour—like an unexpected trip to the ice cream shop for cleaning up without being asked.
“First, Then” Statements: Use reinforcement to encourage less-favoured activities. Example: “First, finish your homework, then you can have tablet time.”

Common Mistakes and How to Avoid Them

Even with the best intentions, reinforcement can go wrong. Here are some pitfalls and tips to keep you on track:

Being inconsistent: If one day you reward a behaviour and the next day you ignore it, your child might get confused. Try to be consistent!
Over-relying on one type of reinforcer: If your child always gets a treat, they might start expecting it every time. Mix it up with praise, activities, and privileges.
Waiting too long to reinforce: If too much time passes, your child might not connect the reward to their behaviour. Try to reinforce as soon as possible.

Final Thoughts

Reinforcement isn’t just for therapists—it’s a powerful parenting tool that can make learning fun, build confidence, and encourage positive behaviour. Whether it’s a hug, a sticker, or a trip to the park, a little reinforcement goes a long way in shaping happy, motivated kids. So go ahead—celebrate those small wins, and watch your child thrive!

Reinforcement: No, it's Not a Bribe!